Stress is a common experience for people nowadays, especially people I know and see in New York City. It is easy to be deceived that stress is an inescapable part of life- yet, I have experienced times in my life when I did not feel stress and have been around many people who live mainly stress free lives. So what is the deal with stress? Why is it a required part of life for some and not for others? Can it be solved with love, friendship, family, geography, real estate, ice cream, massages or money? Or is it inside people psychologically and must be removed with medicine and therapy?
The word stress is both a psychology and biology term that was coined in the 1930’s. (Imagine-a world where the word stress does not exist!) It refers to the consequence of the failure of a human or animal not responding appropriately to physical or emotional threats, whether real or imagined. This definition gives the blame to the person for not getting out of the stressful situation. Another definition is a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or very demanding circumstances. This blames the circumstances. Thus, the person who has the choice to get out of a harmful circumstance but does not is to blame for their stress.
The feelings of stress are mixed with feelings of self-hatred. The workaholic feels the negative impact of stress, yet feels addicted to work. The stereotypical images of people under stress focus on white-collar workers. While anyone can feel stress, the word is most commonly used in academic settings, offices and businesses. The work these people are doing generally involves being inside all day, working on the phone or computer and sitting in meetings. In these cliché situations, the person who is stressed usually feels bad that they are in an unmanageable situation, but also privileged to be in a situation where their mind can be the hero. People being put in these white collar office situations who are having virtual connections with people and doing abstract work, use their intellect to get the job and their intellect to do their work. Their body just follows the orders, and has to go to the gym after work to get excursive. This type of work is clean and well paid, which reflects our cultural brain worship.
Teens and younger children in rigorous academic situations get to be part of this cultural event too. I have heard teens say, “Oh my god this project is making me soooo stressed! I only got four hours of sleep last night and I’ve had three lattes today. I feel soooo crazy right now.” They are excited to finally have important work to do. They know it is important because they are only using their brain and have been given way too much work to do in a short period of time, like grown ups. They pass or fail these tests and it shapes their future, will it be the path to an Ivy League school or a curvy dark alternative path?
Being able to succeed in hard situations like staying up all night to finish a huge project once or twice a year is a real skill to have, but many companies today operate under this super stressful model year round. They liken the ‘heroic’ work the staff is doing to ‘running a marathon’, and say things like, “We stay until the job is done.” This is to seduce the minds to want to do the work of the privileged, no matter what the cost to the health and quality of life of the workers.
