I recently had the pleasure of attending my cousin’s Bat Mitzvah. It was interesting to observe a ceremony for a girl on the edge of childhood and womanhood; celebrating her entrance to that special in-between place we call Teenager.
I had never been to a Bar or Bat Mitzvah before. My family is mostly Christian, and the other Jewish relatives I have turned 13 when I was still a baby. I was very curious to finally get to see what they were all about. I compared the ceremony as a type of Sweet Sixteen party, plus religion. I was quite wrong. The Bar (for boys) or Bat (for girls) Mitzvah ceremony marks a young person’s public acceptance of the Jewish faith. It is more easily compared to the Catholic sacrament of Confirmation, where teenagers choose the religion for themselves.
I was not prepared for the experience of witnessing my cousin becoming a Bat Mitzvah. Entering the temple, I was instantly calmed and inspired by the architecture. The room had an altar, bordered by a half circle of curved pews. On the altar there was a large deep purple mosaic column-the Ark- that holds the Torah. All along the back and sidewalls there are large picture windows that show the surrounding pine trees.
The ceremony began and was led by a woman rabbi and another woman. My cousin stood with them and practically led the ceremony. They all wore a special piece of fabric around their shoulders and she resembled them. It was so inspiring to see a woman rabbi, as I grew up Catholic and only have seen men priests. She read the Torah in Hebrew, was blessed by four Aliyahs and then she read her interpretation of a bible story. Her thoughts were well written; reflecting her family and religion and showing the particular mix of child/teenager she had just become. She chose a charity to give a percentage of her gift money to. She was presented with gifts form her congregation, her Jewish elementary school friends, her middle school friends and her sister. The gifts were all thoughtful-a special cup to use at Passover, a partial scholarship to visit Israel etc.
The rabbi gave a personal talk about my cousin and how she was taking her first step into adulthood. She said this brings freedom, and with freedom comes responsibility. She said her family, congregation and friends were here to support her today, and would always be here to support her in everything she does, and help her when she makes mistakes.
Watching my cousin lead and be led as she became a Bat Mitzvah, I felt so proud of her and who she was becoming. I also felt saddened for myself, that I never had this type of experience when I so naively walked into adulthood. The experience of this ceremony was a new way for me to view the transition between childhood and adulthood. I saw a meaningful ceremony publically acknowledging the personal journey of a new teenager, by giving the teenager love, tradition and guidance.
